Parenting After Divorce Archives - Child-Centered Divorce

Using Your Children As Spies Post-Divorc...

Probing and pressuring can be abusive when you cross the line By Rosalind Sedacca Following divorce it's tempting to turn your children into "spies." Don't go there! When children are told to report on the activities of the other parent, it places the children in a no-win situation. Even worse, using your children as spies has other negative consequences. It promotes lying and deceit. Not surprisingly, encouraging spying also leads to picking sides. And it often creates loyalty conflicts for your children. As a result, your kids may clam up, become untruthful, or untrustworthy. Not surprisingly, it's not easy to break the habit of inappropriately questioning your children after they return from time spent with their other parent. However, it must be done. It helps to think about it from your child's perspective. How do your kids feel when transitioning from one home to the other?

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5 Ways to Ease Post-Divorce Between-Home Transitions for Your Kids

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC During divorce proceedings, parenting plans or contact schedules are usually established to create a semblance of routine in this new chapter of family life. Easing the post-divorce between-home transitions is a crucial factor. I strongly believe in co-parenting whenever possible to serve the best interest of your children, It’s the reality of daily life experiences that puts everyone to the test. Here are 5 helpful ways to improve the process for everyone involved. Be patient with one another. Starting any new schedule in life is never easy. Chances are the between-homes transition will present a number of challenges for you as you adapt to the many responsibilities involved. At the same time, think about the challenges for your children who never signed on for this. Be especially empathic with them if they express frustration, anger and resentment at first. Also allow your children time to adjust

Parenting After Divorce

Holiday Coping Tips For Divorced Parents When Apart From Your Kids!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC One of the saddest consequences of divorce for parents is the alone time when your children are visiting their other parent. While short-term periods can be a welcome respite for an overscheduled single parent, that’s not always the case. For many co-parents, the intervals between seeing the children can be long and lonely. This is especially so during the holiday season. And even more challenging when friends and neighbors are busy with their own family gatherings. It’s really important for parents who are alone during the winter holidays to get creative and absorbed in activities you find personally fulfilling. This time of year can also be an opportunity to reflect on meeting your own needs. That includes finding friends and activities that bring joy into your life on a personal level rather than a parental level. Avoid comments and behavior you’ll later regret! Among the greatest

Parenting After Divorce

Dating After Divorce: 3 Tips When Telling Your Teens!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC We all know divorce creates havoc in any family’s life, especially when children are involved – even adult children. Moving on after divorce can also be challenging. It’s a time to be very gentle, both with yourself as well as with your children. Chances are, you made a considerable emotional investment in your marriage. Having seen that relationship fail can make you insecure about facing new relationships ahead. So take the time to go within. Learn from your mistakes -- we've all made them. Understand the lessons from your marriage. Determine new ways to approach future relationships. At some point you will feel ready to step back out into the dating world again. Then you face the challenge of breaking the news to your children. Tweens, teens and grown children usually present special challenges. So prepare with that in mind. Be Sensitive and Empathic! Of course

Parenting After Divorce

5 Ways To Help Your Kids Genuinely Thrive After Your Divorce!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC How do you know your kids are managing well after your divorce? As a divorced parent you owe it to your children to diligently watch their behavior. And listen to their conversations. In addition, to be aware of any changes that may be due to challenges related to the divorce. Children can adapt well to life after divorce. But it’s up to you to catch signs they may be confused, anxious, insecure or in other ways having problems coping with their new reality. Here are 5 vitally important ways to know your children are doing well, and thriving, despite your divorce: They continue to thrive at school When school grades fall or aggressive behavior develops, parents need to be proactive and not wait on the sidelines. Conversations with teachers and school counselors can give you a better perspective on your child’s needs. Don’t hesitate to talk

Parenting After Divorce

How Parental Anger Affects Your Children – During & Long After Divorce!

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Children have a difficult time understanding what your anger means. They may experience shock, disbelief, fear, guilt, grief, confusion, shame and outrage by your aggressive tendencies. Observe how your behavior is affecting the children in your home and realize that you are a major role model for them. It is very likely that your children will grow to imitate your behavior and reactions – even if they disapprove of it at this time. Adults are responsible for helping children learn appropriate behaviors and coping skills. Without positive guidance children may experience the following behavior patterns resulting from your anger issues: Physical aggression towards others such as hitting, harming, screaming, kicking, etc. Sleep problems Feelings of inadequacy Increased fears, especially about losing a parent through divorce Depression/sadness School behavior problems Stomach aches, headaches, nausea and other stress-related physical symptoms Feeling their home is no longer a safe

Parenting After Divorce

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC Since its inception in 2011, Soberlink has been a leader in monitoring blood alcohol content for Family Law, Addiction Treatment, and Workplace Compliance. The remote breathalyzer, utilizing facial recognition technology similar to that on your phone, ensures the test-taker's identity and sends immediate results to specified contacts. This not only proves sobriety but also offers peace of mind to all concerned parties. Additionally, the device is equipped with smart technology to detect any attempts to deceive the test, ensuring the integrity of the results. Embracing Convenience, Speed, and Reliability Soberlink's alcohol monitoring is not punitive but rather a tool designed to ensure the wellbeing of both parents and children. Soberlink simplifies the process of remote alcohol testing, offering convenience, speed, and reliability—especially in custody and alcohol-related cases. The system’s Advanced Reporting feature uses AI to generates easy-to-understand testing reports, as well, so Family Law professionals and

Parenting After Divorce

Answers To Divorced Parents Questions About Holiday Season Challenges

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC What makes the holiday season so challenging for parents considering divorce, moving through the process or transitioning after divorce? Memories of the past. So many difficult emotions come up. It’s frightening to think of what lies ahead when a marriage breaks apart. It’s hard to face the differences in our life, especially all the unknowns looming ahead. For many, there’s a the challenge of facing lonliness versus being alone and content. Be aware of what you are telling yourself. Expectations set us up for disappointment. When we focus on the past and make comparisons, that’s when we feel the pain and sadness more acutely. Feeling powerless adds to the pain and frustration. How does your mindset, beliefs and expectations impact your holiday experience? Our attitude influences how we handle any challenge. We need to understand that change is natural in life. Accepting change is essential for

Parenting After Divorce

When Children of Divorce Act Out – Caring Parents Step Up!

By Rosalind Sedacca CDC Divorce, like life, is rarely neat and packaged. This is especially true for divorcing parents. The reality of divorce comes with challenges. Unexpected twists, constant frustrations and times of utter helplessness when children act out or pull away. Here are three important tips for coping and responding when your children are venting or lashing out. Or perhaps, expressing their own frustrations about being caught up in a family adjusting to separation or divorce. 1. Diffuse blame Some children, especially pre-teens and teens, may blame one parent or the other for the divorce. Sometimes they may be correct in this interpretation. Especially under situations they have been aware of for years (alcoholism, absent parent, domestic violence, etc.). Other times they side with one parent as a result of their prior relationship dynamics with that parent. Regardless of why you or your spouse are blamed, keep your cool.

Parenting After Divorce

Teens Taking Sides A Painful Consequence of Divorce

By Rosalind Sedacca, CDC I received the following question which poses many challenges related to divorce and parenting. While there is never a one-size-fits-all answer to relationship questions, I’m sharing my response with you as a perspective worth considering. This may be useful to initiate conversations with your former spouse and children or for discussion with a therapist or divorce coach if you are seeing one. I am divorced for a short while, after being separated for several years. My 16-year-old daughter is awful to me and she yells "I hate you" and even curses at me even in public. I am sure she blames me for leaving her mom, but my other two children (boys, one older and one younger) seem to be dealing with the divorce fine. My problem is that I have no control over discipline. I would never speak to anyone the way she speaks to

Parenting After Divorce

Using Your Children As Spies Post-Divorc...

5 Ways to Ease Post-Divorce Between-Home...

Holiday Coping Tips For Divorced Parents...

Dating After Divorce: 3 Tips When Tellin...

5 Ways To Help Your Kids Genuinely Thriv...

How Parental Anger Affects Your Children...

Proving Sobriety With Soberlink

Answers To Divorced Parents Questions Ab...

When Children of Divorce Act Out – Carin

Teens Taking Sides A Painful Consequence...

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